“I like you.”
“I think you are grand.”
“I see such potential in you.”
“You have what it takes to go far.”
Great words of esteem, aren’t they? When we hear words like these we just step a bit lighter, our pace quickens, and good feelings simply flow through our veins and give us a euphoric sensation.
Everyone with whom you and I come into contact deserves to be respected and valued. There are redeeming qualities in each of us. But do we take the time to see them?
Do we, instead, look down, think less than admirable thoughts toward that person just because of what we see on the outside, or because they fit into a certain socio-economic group?
Keep reading, I’m coming to some good stuff.
There is nothing worse than the dehumanizing of another human being.
I recently read Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. Dr. Frankl was held prisoner in more than one German prisoner of war camp leading up to the end of World War II. In the book he commented: “Any guard that wanted to make a charge against a prisoner just glanced at his number (and how we dreaded such glances!); he never asked for his name.” (Man’s Search for Meaning Page 6, Victor Frankl.)
In an environment like this, the norm is to treat your prisoners as a number, a “thing” without merit and without significance. There was no humanity in that environment. Viktor Frankl was nothing but a cipher, an empty zero.
In his book Character Is Destiny, John McCain tells the story of an incident that happened when he was a prisoner in Hanoi during the Viet Nam conflict. One day he found himself in solitary confinement, with his hands tied tightly behind his back. His wrists were hurting from the bindings and his arms ached from the awkward position in which his captors had bound him.
Around mid-morning his captor came into his space of isolation. John didn’t know whether he was going to receive a beating, be spat upon or have to endure some other miss-treatment, so he braced himself for the worst.
His captor walked over to where John was lying on the ground, turned him over onto his stomach, and then did a surprising thing. He loosened the ropes binding John’s hands just slightly, with enough slack to give John a bit less of a strain and less tension. The rope burns actually lessened by this random act of kindness.
As his captor stood to leave, he moved his foot next to John’s head and with the toe of his boot he made a sign of the cross on the dirt floor so that John could see it, and then promptly rubbed it out. This simple act of significance did much to revive John’s spirits on that day of pain and torture. John had just received the gift of significance.
I love that! In the midst of pain came a grace-filled act. The captor stepped out of his role for one moment in time and extended significance to Mr. McCain.
One of my favorite movies is Patch Adams starring Robin Williams. In one particular scene Patch is with a group of other third-year medical students following a more experienced doctor on his daily rounds at the hospital. As they approach a woman lying in bed, you can sense fear and trepidation within her. The experienced doctor picked up her chart, cleared his voice and said, “This patient from Room 313 has a serious case of edema.”
Patch quietly asked, “Does this patient have a name?”
“Why yes. Her name is … Doris,” stated the experienced doctor.
“Hello Doris. How are you?” asked Patch.
One can sense an automatic relaxation response in Doris. She smiled, and you can see that the fear was leaving her, all because of the use of her name. She became a person in that moment in time, not “the patient in Room 313.”
It is significant to be important, but it’s more important to be significant. Mankind cries out to be recognized. All of us long to make a connection, that moment of recognition for who we are, not what we are. I love what Mary Kay Ash says in her book People Management. “Imagine that every person you meet is wearing an invisible sign around their neck that says, ‘Make Me Feel Important.’”
It is a proven fact that people will speak up more in a group if they receive individual eye contact. That is recognition because of significance.
I had a college professor by the name of Jim VanHook. He instilled in me a philosophy that I’ve never forgotten. It is simply “Love the People!” That is another way of saying “You are significant!”
John Maxwell tells this story in his book Dare to Dream that perfectly illustrates my point.
He says, “An experienced nurse recounts her story: ‘During my second month of nursing school our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: “What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?”
‘Surely this was some kind of joke! I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired, and in her fifties, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.
‘Before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. “Absolutely,” said the professor. “In your careers you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say hello.” The nurse continued, “I’ve never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.’”
I began this blog with the story of Viktor Frankl. I’m quoting from my favorite book Aspire by Kevin Hall as he speaks of Dr. Frankl. “It is interesting to note this about him. The man who had become a number became a person.” (Aspire, Page 14, Kevin Hall) (By the way, Dr. Frankl’s number was 119,104, but his name lives long after, thanks to his legacy and his will to live and make a difference.)
Do you feel significant? I hope so. Just in case you may be feeling less than adequate, let me give you a word of encouragement.
Even though we may have never met, I know some things about you.
You are made in God’s image, with a plan for your life, tailor-made for you.
You have a unique DNA, a unique set of finger prints and voice print.
You have uniqueness written all over you and it is just awaiting your discovery.
Life is worth living.
Whatever difficulties you are facing at this particular moment, remember, “This too shall pass”.
If you feel that no one else cares about you, we here at Up-Words care.
You are important, and you certainly are significant!
“I think you are grand.”
“I see such potential in you.”
“You have what it takes to go far.”
Great words of esteem, aren’t they? When we hear words like these we just step a bit lighter, our pace quickens, and good feelings simply flow through our veins and give us a euphoric sensation.
Everyone with whom you and I come into contact deserves to be respected and valued. There are redeeming qualities in each of us. But do we take the time to see them?
Do we, instead, look down, think less than admirable thoughts toward that person just because of what we see on the outside, or because they fit into a certain socio-economic group?
Keep reading, I’m coming to some good stuff.
There is nothing worse than the dehumanizing of another human being.
I recently read Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. Dr. Frankl was held prisoner in more than one German prisoner of war camp leading up to the end of World War II. In the book he commented: “Any guard that wanted to make a charge against a prisoner just glanced at his number (and how we dreaded such glances!); he never asked for his name.” (Man’s Search for Meaning Page 6, Victor Frankl.)
In an environment like this, the norm is to treat your prisoners as a number, a “thing” without merit and without significance. There was no humanity in that environment. Viktor Frankl was nothing but a cipher, an empty zero.
In his book Character Is Destiny, John McCain tells the story of an incident that happened when he was a prisoner in Hanoi during the Viet Nam conflict. One day he found himself in solitary confinement, with his hands tied tightly behind his back. His wrists were hurting from the bindings and his arms ached from the awkward position in which his captors had bound him.
Around mid-morning his captor came into his space of isolation. John didn’t know whether he was going to receive a beating, be spat upon or have to endure some other miss-treatment, so he braced himself for the worst.
His captor walked over to where John was lying on the ground, turned him over onto his stomach, and then did a surprising thing. He loosened the ropes binding John’s hands just slightly, with enough slack to give John a bit less of a strain and less tension. The rope burns actually lessened by this random act of kindness.
As his captor stood to leave, he moved his foot next to John’s head and with the toe of his boot he made a sign of the cross on the dirt floor so that John could see it, and then promptly rubbed it out. This simple act of significance did much to revive John’s spirits on that day of pain and torture. John had just received the gift of significance.
I love that! In the midst of pain came a grace-filled act. The captor stepped out of his role for one moment in time and extended significance to Mr. McCain.
One of my favorite movies is Patch Adams starring Robin Williams. In one particular scene Patch is with a group of other third-year medical students following a more experienced doctor on his daily rounds at the hospital. As they approach a woman lying in bed, you can sense fear and trepidation within her. The experienced doctor picked up her chart, cleared his voice and said, “This patient from Room 313 has a serious case of edema.”
Patch quietly asked, “Does this patient have a name?”
“Why yes. Her name is … Doris,” stated the experienced doctor.
“Hello Doris. How are you?” asked Patch.
One can sense an automatic relaxation response in Doris. She smiled, and you can see that the fear was leaving her, all because of the use of her name. She became a person in that moment in time, not “the patient in Room 313.”
It is significant to be important, but it’s more important to be significant. Mankind cries out to be recognized. All of us long to make a connection, that moment of recognition for who we are, not what we are. I love what Mary Kay Ash says in her book People Management. “Imagine that every person you meet is wearing an invisible sign around their neck that says, ‘Make Me Feel Important.’”
It is a proven fact that people will speak up more in a group if they receive individual eye contact. That is recognition because of significance.
I had a college professor by the name of Jim VanHook. He instilled in me a philosophy that I’ve never forgotten. It is simply “Love the People!” That is another way of saying “You are significant!”
John Maxwell tells this story in his book Dare to Dream that perfectly illustrates my point.
He says, “An experienced nurse recounts her story: ‘During my second month of nursing school our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: “What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?”
‘Surely this was some kind of joke! I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired, and in her fifties, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.
‘Before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. “Absolutely,” said the professor. “In your careers you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say hello.” The nurse continued, “I’ve never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.’”
I began this blog with the story of Viktor Frankl. I’m quoting from my favorite book Aspire by Kevin Hall as he speaks of Dr. Frankl. “It is interesting to note this about him. The man who had become a number became a person.” (Aspire, Page 14, Kevin Hall) (By the way, Dr. Frankl’s number was 119,104, but his name lives long after, thanks to his legacy and his will to live and make a difference.)
Do you feel significant? I hope so. Just in case you may be feeling less than adequate, let me give you a word of encouragement.
Even though we may have never met, I know some things about you.
You are made in God’s image, with a plan for your life, tailor-made for you.
You have a unique DNA, a unique set of finger prints and voice print.
You have uniqueness written all over you and it is just awaiting your discovery.
Life is worth living.
Whatever difficulties you are facing at this particular moment, remember, “This too shall pass”.
If you feel that no one else cares about you, we here at Up-Words care.
You are important, and you certainly are significant!
Remember trying to learn to walk? Too long ago? Well you fell in your efforts. Ever get a failing grade in school? Was that the end of the world? From my failure in Latin I learned to keep up in Spanish. Jack Niklaus when asked what contributed most to his success as a golfer said, My failures. I learn much more from my mistakes and defeats than my victories and successes.
ReplyDeleteHave parents always succeeded with their children? But what about the blessings that come from learning through those experiences?
We like to show that our armor is in tact. Failure shows a crack; a place of vulnerability in our humanity. No matter how bright you try to paint the picture, failure is the cloud that dims the entire landscape.
We've said, "I thought I could make it work; I thought I had gotten through this; I thought I had it all put together. But the pieces fell apart and my life is going nowhere. I'm beat!
No you're not. You are better than Charlie Brown:
Lucy at her counselling booth says to Charlie Brown; "Sometimes I feel we are not communicating: You, Charlie Brown are a foul ball in the line drive of life. You're often in the shadow of your own goal post. You're a mis-cue; You're 3 putts on the 18th hole. You're a 7-10 split in the 10th frame. You have dropped a rod & reel in the lake of life. You're a shanked 9-iron, a called 3rd strike, a bug on the windshield of life! Do you understand, have I made myself clear?"
Poor Charlie Brown.
But come and sit in my seat next to him in his riding cart. We've all been there. But that's not the end of the story.
Even Jesus knew failure. Listen to him: "I was not popular. I was a political failure. All levels of government first rejected me then conspired to kill me. I did not have lots of friends. My friends often hurt me. Eventually even they abandoned me and one of them betrayed me to death. I did not have money or possessions. No house, no "wheels" no world headquarters, no Christian amusement park. I wasn't even respected by my peers. My professional peers (Pharisees) rejected my work."
But despite his apparent failure by these standards, Jesus Christ has changed the lives of millions of men and women across the centuries. How did he, in light of his failures?
Do not quit. Get up and keep going. "Come after me," he calls, "I won't quit on you."
That's Final!
This was a timely read for me. Thank you.
ReplyDelete